End of Winter, Hurray!

This has been the coldest winter in Texas that I can remember, and considering I have lived here my entire life, that is pretty cold. The weather has risen back into standard pre-Spring temperatures of 60s-80s, and even the trees are starting to bud leaves. We have been taking advantage of this beautiful weather to go for walks and play in the backyard. They love being outside but I have to make sure that Collin wears shoes or he will scrape his feet up and not even notice. Yesterday we were playing outside and when I noticed that Collin had four bites (looked like ant bites or mosquito bites) on his hand that he had not even made the smallest mention of, I decided it was time to go back in.

I have a question for all you moms of toddlers out there... What are your thoughts and ideas about disciplining toddlers? I am starting to try Time Out with the boys to help discipline them, using a small pack-n-play as the Time Out spot (because there is NO way I can get them to stay in one spot voluntarily). One of the ECI therapists said they should be in Time Out for one minute for each year old, so two minutes at a time. Now Cyrus has really taken to this concept and the mere threatening of Time Out has caused him to stop doing whatever his isn't supposed to be doing, but on the days that they go in Time Out they wail and cry at bedtime. Is it because I am using a crib-like environment for the Time Out spot? Cyrus will repeat over and over "time out" when I bring it up and then go over to the pack-n-play and point to it. He certainly gets it. I am not sure if Collin does yet. Last night Collin cried every time I left him in his crib for hours, wailing whenever I would put him down until 11:00 PM! I would go in and hold him until I thought he was asleep, but he would start up again moments after I left the room. Maybe it is just because it is a new thing and they will stop this, but it certainly concerns me.

Monday Cyrus is going in for his semi-annual CT scan to make sure his VP shunt is in place. They will have to sedate him to do it because of his age, so he will spend the afternoon groggy and sleepy. We will go see the neurologist on Wednesday to hear the Dr. tell us that the results of the scan are fine.

I got a call from the hospital about Collin's pH probe and they said, yep, he has reflux. Uh, thanks. Tell me something I do not know! We will see the Gastro Dr at the end of the month and hopefully she can give us some more comprehensive information about his test. Collin has finally begun his Speech therapy at the rehab center through the hospital, which is good, but now he wont be getting Speech therapy through ECI at home. He had his physical therapy evaluation this past week and they are having him fitted for orthotics, which are basically foot braces to keep his ankles in alignment. They are also reintroducing the idea of the pediatric walker, saying that they do not anticipate him being able to walk on his own for up to a year from now, so the walker could be a great way to encourage him to be upright (in a lesser way like the Ponywalker, perhaps?) We shall see, since we have to wait the 6-8 weeks for the insurance to approve of the therapy.

Big Cyrus smiles!


Sweet Collin smiles.


I am so cool!


Coloring with chalk in the backyard.


Collin getting a closer look at the shapes Mommy drew for them.


My friend Tara came up from San Antonio to visit for a weekend.
Cyrus & Collin loved playing with her! We love you!

Collin's EGD & pH Probe

Early Monday morning we went over to the hospital and Collin had his EGD (Upper GI using a camera probe) and had a pH probe put in his nose to monitor his reflux. With his heavily scarred veins they did have to stick him twice to get a vein, but he was out at the time so didn't feel it. We were in and out in about four hours, and although it was fairly fast, Collin did not do well in Recovery. He never seemed to get comfortable and refused to drink anything. Luckily the nurse got permission from the anesthesiologist to let us leave even though he had nothing to drink. Once we got him in the car he was fine, and I sat in the backseat while my mother drove my car home. BTW, there was NO space for me in the backseat between those two carseats and had to sit at an angle just to get my butt on the seat! Gives me a new appreciation for my daughter having to sit there when we travel.

Once we were home I had to document his coughing, gaging, spitting up, sneezing, irritability, sleep, and feeding schedule until 6:30 AM Tuesday morning. Then I got to take out the tube and rush back to the hospital to return the data device by 7:30 AM. Woo Hoo, getting up at the crack of dawn two days in a row after no sleep. I was paranoid that Collin was going to wrap the tube around his neck in his sleep, so I checked in on him every two hours. It didn't, and I used some footy pajamas that have the snap at the neck to keep the tube out of the way (a little trick I learned in the NICU). He did great with the tube and Cyrus spent the night with my parents so I could focus all my attention on keeping only one set of hands away from the tube.

I was really impressed by how well Collin did once we got home, and whenever he tried to scratch or pull at the tube I scratched his nose for him, which he thought was a fun game. Whew! He ate well, slept well, and over all was less stressful than a typical day with twins. Funny, even when he has a tube down his esophagus taped to his face, carrying a data pack that he was not supposed to play with (uh-huh, yeah right!) it was easier than taking care of two kids at once! We will get the results of the test in two weeks and will see the Gastro Dr in six weeks for a follow-up.

Collin had a blast playing with all the toys in
the pre-op area, especially this piano tiger.



Not happy in Recovery. :(



Wagon ride to the car! Yea! It was the first time
he had really calmed down since the surgery.



Playing in the sink before brushing his teeth at bedtime.
Look at that CD player sized device he had to carry around!
And yes, we took the hospital gown home, b/c Mommy wasn't thinking
when she dressed him in a sweatshirt to take him to the hospital.

Happy 2nd Adjusted Birthday

Today is Collin and Cyrus' 2nd birthday... if they had been born on time. It seems so long ago since they turned two and only now are they "caught up" with their due date birthday. Happy Adjusted Birthday my sweet boys! Cyrus is pretty much a typical toddler, caught up is most respects. Collin can say "mama,"and uses some sounds to convey words like "mm" for more and "uh" for up. He is trying to pull himself up to standing on his own and can come up to standing using only my legs (while I am sitting on the floor) to stand up. He is trying really hard and getting closer every day. But other than that, he is getting caught up too... amazing little boys. What a great birthday present for their adjusted birthday, happy little miracle boys.

Collin got his new glasses today, and looks ever so smart. I knew his old glasses were too small for him but to see him in these, they look, well, huge. But he smiled immediately when the lady put them on him and didn't even try to take them off. He is having his upper GI & pH probe surgical procedure Monday morning. That will be fun. Uh-huh. We finally got approval for Speech therapy through the hospital today, and will start in a week or two. Insurance allows us 20 sessions and the therapist recommended we do one session a week instead of two since we have a limited amount. Essentially intense therapy is good, but prolonged therapy is better, so it begins.

Cyrus is doing fine, his hernia scar is healing nicely. He has started doing this head butt thing (like the kid in Parenthood) where he likes to butt things, well, mostly people with his head. He crawls up behind Collin and butts him in the back, then they both laugh. He butts me in the face, making me wonder if my nose is about to bleed. I don't know when it started, but he has made it his new favorite thing to do for the past couple of days. He is also talking more than ever, loving to point out every blonde girl he sees and calling her Gaia, even girls on TV and on billboards. He has learned the concept of push and pull, but calls them both "push." Today he wanted to play tug-of-war with this foam strip.

Cyrus is reaching for Collin's Blankie. No reason, he just wants what Collin has.



Collin at the Eyeglasses store with his fancy tortoise shell glasses.
The same shape as his old ones, but they look so BIG!

Cyrus being sassy as usual. Hey everyone look at me!

Eye Dr, Nutritionist, & Neurologist

Yesterday we went to the eye doctor for both the boys, and it was awful! They were not wanting to be there, and having to get their eyes dilated didn't help. We were there for over two and a half hours and it cut into their nap time. But the good news is that Cyrus does not need glasses and his problems with steps and changes in floor texture is not related to his eyes. Collin looks good too, but he is a little more near sighted than before and needs new glasses. Poor guy had trouble with the exam and they ended up reopening a cut next to his eye trying to pry them open for the exam. They gave me some eye safe antibiotic cream to take home. A rough appointment...

We saw the nutritionist this morning so we have their current weight/heights. She has recommended that we go down to two bottles of Pediasure a day to help encourage them to eat more food at mealtimes. But Collin has gone through a big growth spurt, so that could be part of the poor height to weight ratio he has right now (12 %).

Collin
24 lbs. 13 oz.
34 1/8 inches

Cyrus
26 lbs 15 oz.
34 1/2 inches

Earlier this morning we saw the Neurologist for the first time and he was very nice. He says that Collin is doing very well and with his progress it is just too soon to diagnose him with Cerebral Palsy. We are going back in six months and see how well he is doing then, and if necessary do an MRI. But for now Collin is good! Hurray it was great news from our doctor appointments for the past two days! Tomorrow is our follow-up gastro appointment. No rest for the preemie...

When he isn't paying attention he can stand all by himself for a few seconds...


Here Collin, Gaia, and Cyrus are all sharing her pillow on
the big pallet she made in front of the TV.
They were all a little sleepy....


Just a nice photo of big sister Gaia in her new blouse!

We're Feeling Much Better Now

Thank goodness we are on the other side of that sickness! Let us hope that the rest of this winter season is far more healthy. We are getting back into the swing of things, therapy sessions, DR appointments and playdates. :)

Today we went to a great multiples playgroup that had ten little rugrats (all two and under) plus two older siblings (who luckily were the same age and therefore had someone to play with). It was chaos of course but lots of fun. Cyrus was the most chatty kid there! I was so proud that he was just conversing with whoever would listen to him; he has come so far. Collin spent most of his time turning the TV on and off and trying to get into other electronic equipment. I needed the social interaction as much as the boys did, and really had fun talking to the other moms. Although sometimes I forget that preemies aren't a "multiples" thing and get caught off guard by the looks of shock of telling my story to the new moms I meet (I REALLY summarize) and I bet those who I see us regularly are getting tired of hearing me babble on about it. What you mean your kids do not have to go to therapy every week and have seven different doctors and take RSV shots that cost more than your car?

Tuesday Collin sees the Neurologist for the first time. The gastro Dr is very concerned that Collin has Cerebral Palsy, and I do not know what is entailed in being diagnosed. Nor do I know what this would really mean for Collin and I have received conflicting reports from therapists. On one hand there is the insurance coverage increase by the diagnosis and so more therapy sessions a week to help him out. On the other hand, he may be labeled for limitations that he can overcome if not stereotyped by future teachers/doctors/therapists. I am not putting too much into this yet, but honestly it would not surprise me.

Hey Cyrus, this milk is excellent! You should try it without the lid!


Flashback to the eighties, baby!


*elbows his brother* Cyrus! Check out that thing over there!
Uh huh, sure. Whatever, Collin.

We All Got It

As of today, it is official, everyone who lives in this house is sick. Craig came home from work today saying he has been feeling bad at work all day, and luckily for him he has only one more day left before his three day "weekend." Of course he will be spending his free time being sick but its better than calling in when you are on hourly wages. We were supposed to have big sister Gaia over this weekend, but with all the sickness around here we arranged it for another weekend. Which is good, since she has three more little brothers at her other house and one is less than three months old. I would feel awful if this icky bug got sent home with her and everyone got sick there too.

Collin and Cyrus are feeling a little better, but are absolutely refusing to eat. It has been a flashback to the good old days of trying to get them to eat baby food, only now they are smarter and know the tricks, like spitting it out, flailing their arms in protest, and using sign language for "all done" after only two bites. As being sick goes, Cyrus is worse off than Collin, but at the moment I think I am the sickest. My parents offered to come over for the afternoon today and babysit so I could get some rest, BLESS THEM!! I got like five hours sleep in a row, which is really good and I needed badly. Let us hope that we are all feeling better by Monday so we do not have to cancel anymore Dr/therapy appointments, because holy cow people, this is getting ridiculous!

Collin has maneuvered himself behind the cat tower
and the coffee table to get at the window. Apparently
our curtains have a little static cling going on...



Cyrus is playing with kitty, being very gentle.
With reminders of course.



Collin is holding on to the industrial size baby gate that
Craig made to go around the computer/kitchen table.
I think he has his eyes on my computer...


Cyrus likes to hide under blankets and so I
thought he might like a tunnel. He did.

Snowed In

Okay, maybe not snow, but ice and sleet. We were supposed to have a playgroup for multiples today at my house and a Dr. appointment for Collin to see the neurologist. Both cancelled, and I was not upset about it in the least. There is something about being tucked inside the warm house when the outside is cold and white that makes you want to sit on the couch and do nothing. I almost did nothing had I not been preparing for company the night before. Aside from Cyrus and Collin being needy today from not feeling well, it was a lazy day. I think they might be teething but they have had the high fevers and now a cough, so maybe the teething is a separate thing and they are getting sick to boot. *throws hands up in the air* I just do not know anymore. They are sick all the time in winter, that is what I have decided.

Of course we have two ECI appointments tomorrow, so no lazing about but today we could. And then Friday, after another ECI appointment, we drive the 45 minutes to pick up their big sister for the weekend. It feels like forever since I saw her now that we don't get to see her every Wednesday like we used to. I hope she is enjoying her new home and new school.

Preemie Magazine

I was curious whether the NICU at Cook Children's Hosptial, where Collin and Cyrus were taken care of in carried Preemie Magazine. I know that a NICU nurse or two checks in on this blog every now and then, so I wanted to leave this link they could fill out to have Preemie Magazine sent to their NICU. I wish that Preemie Magazine had been available when we were in the NICU, so if any other mom's of preemies please pass this information on to your local NICU. We all would have benefit from having it whether we just had our little ones, or are even getting ready for school. I know I have mentioned Preemie Magazine before, but it is such a great magazine... Every NICU and preemie parent should get it!

Houston, We Have a Problem

Collin has a fever. It has gotten up to 101.5, it started last night and has lasted through to this afternoon. I called the hospital to find out if we will need to reschedule his EGD (or Upper GI) and is supposed to go home with a pH probe in the morning and am waiting to hear back from the on-call doctor. It is likely that we will not be going tomorrow. *sigh* I would really like to get this over with and depending on how soon Collin is rescheduled, will determine if he will stay off his reflux meds. I think he is likely teething because he has not other symptoms and has been chewing on everything he can gets his hands on lately. But I do not want to take any chances if he is sick. I will update this when I hear back from the doctor...

UPDATE: Well we are canceling his procedure under the recommendation of the on-call gastro Dr., and the weather. In Texas it doesn't snow, it ices, and right now we are in the middle of a cold (aka 30 degrees, feels like 19), rainy, icy mess that will likely be one of the few real cold spells of our winter. So I am slowly putting Collin back on his reflux meds, since he is sick he doesn't need that to contend with as well. I am also going to try to talk to our Gastro NP and find out if fever can be a side effect to being off the reflux meds. I will let everyone know how it all goes and what I find out. Until then, everyone, stay warm and dry! :P

BTW, Cyrus is doing fine. He had his first bath since surgery last night and I could take off the outer bandage from his incision. He whined and I kept telling him I was sorry and he would cry back "sorry!" but we got it off and then he was fine.

Collin just cruising along the furniture as he does so often now.


Cyrus was chillin' and telling me all about his favorite TV show.

Cyrus checks out his new PJs, they are a little too big for his legs....

Collin's Turn Monday

Well Monday Collin will be taking his turn to the hospital, getting a nose spray to calm him down before they put him out, and then they will easily put in his IV, hopefully. I am so worried about the IV, I know he will be out but the last time he had an IV done it took 11 sticks to get a vein!!! And we will be going home with a tube down his nose to monitor his reflux for 24 hours. Luckily my parents are going to take care of Cyrus during this time so I only have to worry about one child pulling on the tube. Cyrus will be going over to Nana & Grandpa's Sunday night since we have to be at the hospital at 6:00 AM Monday morning. And I thought we had to be there uber early for Cyrus' surgery! In the old days (pre-children days) I would just stay up if I had somewhere to be that caused me to leave the house at 5:30 AM. Wow it really was two lifetimes ago, amazing how so much can change in so little time. Now I am a mother of two little miracle children! And there was a time when I thought I was never going to have children... :P

Bathtub Fun

It was the night before Cyrus' surgery so I thought we would try something fun, no bathtub seats. Collin is not stable enough for bathing without the seat yet, so it was a one time thing for now, but they had a blast while it lasted!

Because everyone likes to see baby butts!


Collin is trying to reach across the tub and drag his
tub seat back into the bath. Cyrus is splashing in
the water, just the beginning of what would be
the Bathtub Splashing Fiasco of 2007. :P


Oh the water is getting deep now! Note that Cyrus is now on
the left side and Collin on the right. They never sat still.


The water got all the way across the room to the
bathroom door by the time they were done with this bath
and Mommy had to change her clothes lest she
catch a cold in her own bathroom! LOL

Surgery Smurgery!

Well Cyrus must have known that he was having surgery early in the morning because he woke up ten minutes before my alarm was set to go off at 5:00 AM. So he watched his favorite TV show The Upside Down Show while I got ready to go and off we went in the wee hours of the morning to the hospital. Craig stayed home with Collin while my mother met me up at the hospital.

All went well... we got in on time, we were the first on our doctor's schedule, right in and right out. His hernia repair surgery was just over 20 minutes long. He had a pretty decent sized hernia and hydrosil, but it was easily stitched up and he was ready to go after about an hour and a half in the recovery room. We spent most of our time trying to get Cyrus to drink something so we could prove he was not nauseous and go home. But after trying all the things that normal kids like (juice, sprite, popsicles) we finally got him to drink from a sports water bottle from the vending machine.

And if you had seem him this afternoon you would have never known this boy had surgery just a few hours ago. He is doing great and the surgeon says that by tomorrow he will be feeling little to no pain (as long as he doesn't pull the incision) and the stitches will dissolve so all we need to do is set up a follow-up in three weeks to make sure every thing still looks good. I am happy, Cyrus is happy, hurray!

Oh and one other thing... I got the Medicaid thing settled yesterday afternoon while at Collin's food/speech rehabilitation evaluation. We got "emergency" Medicaid cards enabled and so that is cleared up! :) NO need to reschedule Collin's gastro appointment on Monday and our prescriptions for Cyrus' pain meds were covered today. Whew! I even got a direct line phone number to a woman I from children's Medicaid! How awesome is that!?!

oh yeah, a second thing... the evaluation for Collin was to replace the therapy from the college in Denton. It looks like we will start in the next 6-8 weeks depending on insurance blah blah blah. Collin will have Speech therapy twice a week! The NP who evaluated Collin gave him great reviews and said with intensive therapy she thinks he will be just fine. He rated 15 months old on the receptive scale, and 8 months old on the expressive scale in language which is right about where I expected. He understands far more than he can express but he tries really hard. *Deep Sigh* So after a whirl wind of emotion and drama things may be calming down for a little while and we can all take a rest. Excellent. :)

Cyrus was so excited about playing the toy area
before surgery, he must have been the happiest child there!


More toy playing in his gown and duck feet socks.


My brave little man still waking up from surgery in
the recovery room snuggling up with Nana.


Cyrus was all set to go and excited to be taking a
wagon to the car... To my carseat, driver!

Knocking on Wood

Cyrus is getting better and has been fever free for 24 hours! Whew! Let's hope that he makes it through until Wednesday... knock, knock. :P In fact he and Collin have been very playful this weekend while their big sister has been here. We might need to reschedule Collin's Gastro procedure because of the Medicaid mix up. Technically we do have Medicaid right now but because of a computer glitch involving the new year that stated we didn't qualify, we are not receiving any of the Medicaid benefits. I have tried contacting the children's Medicaid office (and getting like nine different phone numbers of people who could not help and give me another number to call, etc. until I got to the official office who puts me on hold and I have yet to get a person) everyday last week that they were open and wasted hours of minutes on my phone without ever getting to talk to anyone who could help me. I AM SO FRUSTRATED!!!!

This means our medications are no longer covered, we will owe an additional $500 for Cyrus' surgery on Wednesday, and all our Dr. appointments/ procedures will cost us more upfront. Not an ideal time for a mix up, right after Christmas, but Cyrus needs the surgery more than Collin needs his procedure, so if we do not get this fixed by the end of next week we will have to reschedule Collin. I was going to reschedule Collin's rehab food evaluation but we would not get in until March... Decisions decisions and I want to do what is best for my children and hopefully what is financially viable for us. So if Collin has to wait until March, maybe that is what we have to do.

On a more positive note, Collin has been very vocal lately saying slowly and deliberately "ma-ma" and trying to make consonant sounds! He has also been wanting to walk assisted more too ( hold his hands); normally he resists and would lift his feet. But today he even took a few steps while holding only one hand! It was very exciting, and I am so proud of my big boy Collin! The therapists said that speech is related to walking and I am seeing improvement in both. And speaking of speech, Cyrus is talking constantly, although I have to translate it to others most of the time, but that is okay, I don't mind. :) He makes great associations, like calling a watch a clock. We just need to get some of the technical/business stuff settled so I can go back to focusing my energy on the boys. I feel like I have not been giving them my best lately and now that we are all relatively well we need to get back on schedule.

I apologize, I feel like all I do these days is complain, and sometimes I start to post and stop because I start just venting. My internal dialog isn't very positive, and I need to work on that. And but the way... the PostSecret guy is going to be in town (Grapevine, but its close to Fort Worth) the day after Cyrus' surgery. I am SO bummed out that I will not be able to go and get his latest books (and autograph them!) and listen to his lecture. But I cannot abandon my son the day after his surgery, and besides, Craig is still going to be at work when it starts anyway. :( But I will stop being so selfish and focus on the positive... It is a new year, and this stress too shall pass... all will be well again... ohmm.... :)

Cyrus is helping out Collin by pushing him on the tricycle,
and having a great time doing it too. Isn't that adorable?


Uh oh, Collin, you better steer that thing! You are about
to be pushed right into the box of diapers and wipes!!


Collin cuddles with Daddy on the couch after Daddy's long day at work.


Cyrus takes his turn with Daddy and Collin uses this as
an opportunity to try to steal Cyrus' blankie. Silly Collin...

Think Happy Thoughts

Cyrus has had a fever for almost 24 hours now, as high as 102. I took him into the DR today under the recommendation of the phone nurse, and of course they found out he does not have strep and so they did nothing. I just do not need Cyrus getting sick and having to postpone his surgery on Wednesday. So everyone think happy thoughts that he does not get sick. We were going to a playdate with the multiples group tomorrow too. :( So much for that. Collin and Craig are fine and I am feeling better, so lets just keep Cyrus healthy!!!

Happy New Year!

Welcome 2007! We are looking forward to this year, may each year get better than the last. Collin and Cyrus stayed up until 11:30 PM almost staying up until the ball dropped (again) Central Standard Time. I have high hopes for this year and I am optimistic that changes for the better will be coming.

I am feeling better, but my energy levels are still low. So to make up for my lack of conversation, here are bunches of fun pictures of the holiday season to enjoy!

Bringing in 2007 with a SNAP!
Cyrus hurt himself with the elastic on his hat moments later...


Collin was more interested in examining
the hat rather than wearing it.


Collin was obsessed with playing the piano
on Christmas. No really, he cried and cried
when we tore him away from it.


Cyrus was the Sit n Spin Master,
figuring out how to do it almost immediately.


Big sister Gaia opens her loot- tons of cool clothes!


Cyrus pops out of his gift from Santa, a puppet theater.


Collin and Cyrus watch the show Daddy puts on for them.
They both love playing with the puppets.


I just had to share how happy Collin was
to be inside the kitchen cabinet.


Collin and Cyrus express their artistic side with crayons.
Cyrus was bogarting the crayons and Collin kept eating them. :P

Cut off from LIFE :P

I hope everyone had a Merry Christmas! My computer has been down for a while as my hard drive died and Craig had to get a replacement so I have been cut off from the Internet community and my email since before Christmas. As I am just getting back online and rebuilding my bookmarks and all, I thought I would drop a line in to let the world know we made it through the holidays. :P

The boys got better before Christmas but I finally caved and was sick as a dog on Christmas day. I guess the exhaustion finally caught up with me, and so Christmas day is a bit blurry for me and was a bit chaotic. My poor mother in law got really sick to and so we did not visit the Swain family on Christmas Eve, as is the tradition. Gaia, the boys, and I spent Christmas Eve together and as I was already getting sick it was not very eventful, but once it got dark we went out looking at Christmas lights until Craig got home from work. The boys absolutely loved looking at the lights ohhing and ahhing the whole time, even though it was raining and it was a little hard to see clearly.

I am still sick and will post some pictures soon when I am feeling a little better. Collin and Cyrus lost a lot of weight from this last illness, almost two pounds from Collin and a pound from Cyrus. Everyone who has not seen them lately has noticed Cyrus' weight loss. But they are doing just fine now and are almost back up to eating as much as they were before they were sick! Our sleep schedule is all messed up still and some of you moms out there will be green with envy and other will scorn me, but right now they are sleeping in until almost 10 AM, going to bed around 10:30 PM. As far as sleeping through the night, well, it is more often than not, and so I am trying to take advantage of that and get some rest. Speaking of.... I should do that now. More to come soon! Lots to tell...

First Step, First non-belayed Climb!

I need to go to sleep but I needed to mark these two momentous occasions. First Collin took his first real step today! It was during his ECI PT and I was holding his blankie in front of him, he was standing on his own and took on step with his right leg towards me before sitting down. We tried and tried to get him to do it again, but he was done amazing us for the day. Yeah Collin!!!!! We are so proud of him!

Second, Cyrus officially can climb INTO his crib on his own, has done it now two days in a row. He has yet to try to climb out and that might be the end of his crib days once that happens. But for now it is all about getting in, not out. I guess that rock climbing I did in my first trimester (like I used to do on a regular basis) stuck with him. He felt how much I enjoyed it.

So the boys do not have pneumonia and are feeling much better now. Good thing too since tomorrow is our first appointment with the Gastro Dr. And speaking of that I need to get some sleep, in case I had not mentioned that before. LOL Yeah for healthier boys... I was hoping it would be okay for Christmas, maybe it will after all.

Uh Oh...

We went back to the pediatrician's office today and they ran a couple of minor tests, gave Cyrus a breathing treatment, blah blah. Poor Collin was pitifully sick and I had left the stroller in the garage after having picked up the nine cases of Pediasure from the WIC office the day before. That made our trip to the Dr more interesting, me and two sick little kids; at least Cyrus can walk. We got some antibiotics and some serious cough medicine (basically the same toilet bowl blue stuff, only this time it was purple!) and then we got the kicker. If they are still running a fever by Sat morning then we need to take them in for pneumonia. Lung x-rays, blood tests, the works; and we all know how I feel about blood being drawn from my scarred-veined children. Please, PLEASE, do not let this be pneumonia.

We have missed two therapy appointments, one gastroenterology appointment, and now our last Kindermusik class tomorrow due to this sickness. I am running on caffeine and asian noodle bowls, not getting much sleep, and I am having trouble remembering things even more than I usually do. But who knows if that is just because of this recent sickness or a gradual disintegration of my abilities to function. Thank goodness for Starbucks, or else I may not be able to get out of bed (or off the couch) everyday. Perhaps one day I will accept this life, and stop wishing for them to become healthy little boys without any problems, not have an eternity of debt calling us on a daily basis, have the energy to keep my house as clean and well kept as I would like, have the help to take care of my children and my household the way they deserve, etc.

Now I have to worry about Christmas, and I hate feeling like Christmas is a burden, I love Christmas time, so many wonderful memories of the season. I love shopping for loved ones and getting together with family, yet everything is so complicated now and time is against me. I have never blamed my wonderful boys for my feelings, they are the blessing, the only bright things that make all this tolerable. I just wish it did not have to be this hard, so much I feel illequipped to handle, all that I have to be responsible for. I wish I could be supermom, and happy to take on every problem with grace and wisdom. I wish for many things...

Just Pathetic

Aren't we just pitiful? We may be going back to the pediatrician's office if we aren't better by Friday. This has been going on too long, and I am tired of watching my children vomit all the drainage they have and cant seem to keep their fever down. *Sigh* Happy Holidays, bah humbug... :P

Cyrus lays his head down on the couch in defeat.
He just cannot take anymore sickness.



Poor Collin rests with Daddy while trying to feel better.



My babies collapse in Mommy's lap, take care of us Mommy!